Anger is Satan's tool!

“Anger doesn’t solve anything. It builds nothing, but it can destroy everything.”

This week as I was reading my Book of Mormon, I came across this scripture in 2 Nephi 28:20: “For behold, at that day shall [the devil] rage in the hearts of the children of men, and stir them up to anger against that which is good.”  Anger is everywhere. When things don’t turn out the way we want, or as quickly as we want, or when people don’t act the way we want, it’s easy to become angry.  And when people become angry, they somehow feel the right to hurt, hate, resent, and/or criticize others, along with yelling, screaming, snide remarks, and/or basically throwing a tantrum.  

Think about the look on someone’s face when they are in a rage.  Think about the negative energy that anger brings to a room. The results of anger aren’t anything to be happy about or to feel proud of.  Have you ever been in a grocery store and overheard an angry mother spouting threats and all kinds of other craziness to her kids? (And have you ever been that mother?  I know I have.) It’s easy to see from the outside that a person who is operating with anger has lost control, and guess who they’ve given it to? That’s right, they’re behaving under the influence of the devil.  

Jesus said, “He that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, and he stirreth up the hearts of men to contend with anger, one with another.  Behold, this is not my doctrine, to stir up the hearts of men with anger, one against another; but this is my doctrine, that such things should be done away” (3 Nephi 11:29-30).  

Jesus is telling us to “do away” with anger.  No one said being a disciple of Christ would be easy.  But just because it’s difficult doesn’t mean it is impossible.  In fact, Thomas S. Monson said, “To be angry is to yield to the influence of Satan. No one can make us angry. It is our choice. If we desire to have a proper spirit with us at all times, we must choose to refrain from becoming angry. I testify that such is possible.”  Anger drives away the Spirit of God. We must make conscious efforts to keep the Spirit in our home and to drive away the spirit of the devil.

It’s really easy to blame someone or something else when you get angry.  Whatever they were doing or saying was super irritating or disrespectful, right?   But that’s why anger, as Satan’s tool, is so tricky. It doesn’t seem like it’s your fault.  You say, “She makes me so mad” or “I can’t believe he would do that” or “He shouldn’t talk to me that way,” and the list goes on and on.  But really no one is forcing you to be angry, you’re choosing it. In the end it is our own behavior that we are judged by, not someone else’s--we cannot use the actions of someone else to justify our bad behavior.

Lynn G. Robbins gave a really good talk about “Agency and Anger.”  He said, “Understanding the connection between agency and anger is the first step in eliminating it from our lives. We can choose not to become angry. And we can make that choice today, right now.”  

Take responsibility for the anger you feel and exhibit in your life.  Admit your faults and weaknesses to the Lord, and ask for help. I believe that our bad habits can be overcome if we are sincerely trying to do God’s will and ask for His help to do it.  It will be a lifelong process to keep getting better at. And while you’re trying to overcome it, remember that we’re all going to make mistakes, and that’s okay. Nelson Mandela said, “I’m no saint--that is, unless you think a saint is a sinner who keeps on trying.”  I’m a sinner when it comes to anger too, but I do want to do better, and I do keep trying (when I remember to focus on it). That is what we are doing as disciples of Jesus Christ. We keep on trying and we endure to the end in following the example of Jesus Christ, becoming a little better everyday, “brighter and brighter until the perfect day.”  

What did Jesus teach us about interacting with others?  He taught us to love, to forgive, to have compassion, to turn the other cheek.  “Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you and persecute you”  (Matthew 5:44). And in 4 Nephi 1:15 it says, “There was no contention in the land, because of the love of God which did dwell in the hearts of the people.”  To eliminate contention, we need the love of God and the Spirit of God in our hearts. Recognize the anger and contention as the influence of the devil in your home and start today to make efforts to eliminate it.  We could all use a little more of the Spirit of God in our homes and hearts.

Lynn G Robbins,    https://www.lds.org/general-conference/1998/04/agency-and-anger?lang=eng

Thomas S Monson https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2009/10/school-thy-feelings-o-my-brother?lang=eng

Would I Know My Savior?

This is a song full of questions, the most important being, "Would I know my Savior?" Would we recognize him as the Savior of the world if we saw him lying in a manger?  The shepherds and wise men did.  Simeon and Anna did.  They all knew he was more than another baby; he was the Son of God.  And so the answer to all the questions in the song lies in how we choose to live our lives.  If we are in a position to feel the Holy Spirit in our lives now, we would have been doing the same thing then, and we would have been able to answer YES, I know my Savior.  I love the last verse of the song: "I think my heart would know him, Christ the Holy One. For I can hear the Spirit whisper, 'This is God's own Son.'"  The Spirit testifies of Christ, and I have received my own witness from the Holy Spirit that Jesus Christ is our Savior and that He lives and loves us.  I believe that anyone with a sincere heart and real intent can receive their own testimony of Jesus Christ through the witness of the Holy Ghost.     

Lyrics and Music by Sally Deford, find the sheet music here

Would I Know My Savior?

Would I know my Savior,
wrapped in swaddling bands?
Lying in a manger-bed
Light of heaven round His head
Would I hear the angels
bend t’ward earth to sing?
Would I know the Holy Child?
Would I know my King?

Would I know my Savior,
safe in Mary’s arms?
Cradled in a lullaby
Heaven’s legions watching nigh
Would I know His goodness?
Would I feel His grace?
Would I know the Holy Child
if I beheld his face?

Would I know my Savior,
in a lowly stall?
Where the lowing cattle feed
Where the silver starlight leads
Where the humble shepherds
seek the Holy One
Would I hear the Spirit whisper,
“This is God’s own Son.”

I think my heart would know Him
Christ the Holy One
For I can hear the Spirit whisper,
“This is God’s own Son.”

6 Things to Remember When You're Feeling Overwhelmed

Today wasn’t my best day.  I felt a bit tired and a lot like a grouch.  I was easily annoyed by little things my kids said or did, and I wasn’t very kind.  I didn’t feel like smiling, or listening with empathy, or making things fun, or making dinner, or being responsible for anyone or anything. As I looked around my home, I noticed all the clutter, all the chores that needed to be done, all of the items that needed to be fixed, all the places that needed to be organized, and all the spots I wished looked better or felt better in some way. I felt overwhelmed, annoyed, and uninspired by my obligations and responsibilities.   

In the past I would have whined and complained something like, “Life is hard,” “I hate that I have to do everything,” “Nobody cares about me,” “I can’t be at peace when the house is such a mess,” “My kids are acting like brats,” “I have too much to do and not enough time to do it,” etc. I would have started a lot of my sentences with “I can’t” or “I hate.”  I would have eaten a lot of chocolate or cookies. I would have blamed my children and their tantrums, whining, fighting, or other bad behavior for the strong negative emotions I felt. And then I would have felt guilty for yelling, or guilty for some other behavior, and that would lead to me feeling like the worst mom ever. I would cry in my bedroom and maybe tell my husband of my troubles, and then feel angry, alone, and unloved when he didn’t give me the validation I wanted.    

Thankfully, I know better now.  I’ve recognized that when I am feeling short-tempered, easily annoyed, overwhelmed, and generally dissatisfied, it’s not because of my house, my kids, my husband, or anybody else or anything else outside of me.  And focusing on how I wish those things were different won’t ever help me feel better. And isn’t that what we all really want?

You are Responsible

If you want to feel better, first you need to acknowledge that it’s not anyone else’s job to make you feel better.  It’s not your mom’s job, it’s not your husband’s job, it’s not your kid’s job, it’s not your pet’s job, it’s not your co-worker’s job, it’s not your supervisor’s job, it’s not your Bishop’s job, it’s not your neighbor’s job, it’s not anyone else’s job!  It’s YOUR job! Wouldn’t that be nice if everyone did and said exactly what we wanted, when we wanted, and how we wanted? That’s never going to happen, and if you’re waiting for anyone else to make you feel better, you might be waiting and blaming and complaining a long time.  Accept the fact that it’s your job to help yourself feel better. “Whosoever perisheth, perisheth unto himself...for behold, ye are free; ye are permitted to act for yourselves; for behold, God hath given unto you a knowledge and he hath made you free” (Helaman 14:30). Take a time out, take some deep breaths, take a nap, take a walk, take a break, take a bath.  Use this time to clear your mind and refocus on what matter most in your life. You need to make this time for you because no one else is going to do it for you.

You are Human

You are completely normal, you are not the only one who has ever felt this way, and there is nothing wrong with you or your life.  You are human, and being a human means there will always be “opposition in all things” (2 Nephi 2:11). You will always have challenges, and you aren’t likely to make positive changes when you’re judging and shaming yourself.  I read a book that stated the acronym for SHAME as: Should Have Already Mastered Everything. Humans aren’t born knowing everything. Humans learn step by step, “line upon line; here a little, and there a little” (Isaiah 28:10).  Anytime you think you “should be” better in some way, or that you “should have” known, or that you “shouldn’t have” made that mistake, you are judging and shaming yourself. Also, your human body gets tired after awhile. It is not physically possible for you to complete every item on your to-do list, so be kind to yourself.  “See that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man [or woman] should run faster than he has strength” (Mosiah 4:27).

You are NOT Alone

Jesus has said, “I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you” (John 14:18).  He has said, “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid” (John 14:27).  He has said, “Be of good cheer, and do not fear, for I the Lord am with you, and will stand by you” (D&C 68:6). And “Let your hearts be comforted...for all flesh is in mine hands; be still and know that I am God” (D&C 101:16 or Psalm 46:10).  Do you believe these words from our Savior? Do you trust Him to keep His promises? If you intellectually believe the words, but don’t understand how this can work in your life, ask God for help to understand. Keep trying and praying for His peace, and do what it takes to increase your faith in Jesus Christ.  You are never alone, and peace is available to you now, no matter what you are going through.

You are LOVED

You are a child of God!  You are loved and will always be loved.  Feeling God’s love helps you recognize that nothing has to change in order for you to feel better.  Feeling God’s love brings peace and hope and faith back. Then you can go make changes from a place of love instead of stress and overwhelm.

“Your Heavenly Father loves you—each of you. That love never changes. It is not influenced by your appearance, by your possessions, or by the amount of money you have in your bank account. It is not changed by your talents and abilities. It is simply there. It is there for you when you are sad or happy, discouraged or hopeful. God’s love is there for you whether or not you feel you deserve love. It is simply always there.” -President Thomas S. Monson

Your Experience is for Your Good

“All these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good” (D&C 122:7).   God knows what’s happening in your life and how it is all helping you become the person you are meant to be, even if you can’t see that right now.  If you can believe and trust this, it will change the way you look at your challenges. Instead of pointless suffering, you’ll see that you’re just going through a growing and learning phase, and everything is okay.  It’s a relief to know that this is all somehow for your good. Your journey might not be turning out the way you thought it would, but your journey is the perfect one for you.

“Therefore, let your hearts be comforted; for all things shall work together for good to them that walk uprightly” (D&C 100:15).  A perspective like this will help you to ask questions such as, “How am I growing from this experience, or what am I learning that will help me to bless others?” rather than questions that lead nowhere: “Why me?” and “Why do things have to be so hard?”

You Can Do This!

How do you get to the top of the stairs?  One step at a time. You don't expect yourself to take them all at once. Likewise, you were not sent here to fail, and you have all that you need right now to solve the challenges in your life, one step at a time.  You can do this! Jesus said, “He who is faithful shall overcome all things” (D&C 75:16).  You just need a little faith. It’s easy to fall into hopelessness when you’re right in the middle of a challenge, but you can intentionally choose faith.

In Alma 26:12 it says, “I know that I am nothing; as to my strength I am weak; therefore I will not boast of myself, but I will boast of my God, for in his strength I can do all things.” And so can you.  In the strength of Jesus Christ, you can do whatever it is that you are called upon to do.  When it feels challenging, remember that you can rely upon the strength of Jesus Christ, and you will be able to accomplish the things that matter most.

May God bless you in whatever challenge you are currently facing. You’ve got this.  

Families Can Be Together Forever

I have a family here on earth

They are so good to me

I want to share my life with them through all eternity

Chorus:

Families can be together forever

Through Heavenly Father's Plan

I always want to be with my own family

And the Lord has shown me how I can

The Lord has shown me how I can

While I am in my early years

I'll prepare most carefully

So I can marry in God's temple

For eternity

Chorus

Find the music to this song here

Learn more about the purpose of family and eternal families here

Learn more about temples here 

Read "The Family: A Proclamation to the World" here

When I Am Baptized

I like to look for rainbows whenever there is rain And ponder on the beauty of an earth made clean again I want my life to be as clean as earth right after rain I want to be the best I can and live with God again. I know when I am baptized my wrongs are washed away And I can be forgiven and improve myself each day I want my life to be as clean as earth right after rain I want to be the best I can and live with God again.

Find the music to this song here Find out more about baptism here

Picture by Susan Fitch

I Want to be a Missionary Now

Today we learned "I Want to be a Missionary Now" for primary singing time.  I used the flip chart created by Kathleen White found here.  We had the missionaries visiting for the lesson and this song was perfect.  I usually spend the first 10 minutes teaching the song, then we do some kind of activity to keep it interesting.  So for today's activity, I had the kids dress up as missionaries while we sang the song.  Technically, they were already dressed as missionaries (church clothes), but they like this sort of thing so we do what they like!

For the boys:  White shirt, tie, belt, name tag, Book of Mormon  

For the girls:  Shirt or dress that has buttons, scarf, watch, name tag, Book of Mormon. (The watch could be substituted for something else - gloves, necklace, bracelets, etc., but you want it to take about as much time as a belt for a boy)

In Junior Primary we raced to see if they could get dressed before we sang all three verses.  The buttons proved tricky so we only did one button.  In Senior Primary, we raced boys vs. girls and they had to go knock on the door like a missionary to see who got there first.  To add some fun, we also turned around and sang it facing the back wall while they dressed so (1) the kids would focus on singing the song and (2) it would be a surprise to see who finished first.

To mix it up I threw in other songs so it didn't get boring singing the same song the whole time:

I Will Be Valiant with my own flip chart I made using artwork by Susan Fitch (find it here)

The Church of Jesus Christ with a flip chart made by Susan Fitch (find it here)

I Want to Be A Missionary Now flip chart by Kathleen White here

I Hope They Call Me on a Mission I don't have a flip chart that I really like for this one yet

Elder and Sister Missionary Artwork by Susan Fitch

How Bright is Your Light?

Hi and welcome to Brighter and Brighter, my name is Brenda, and I’ve created this blog and a corresponding YouTube Channel to share my testimony of Jesus Christ and His gospel.  I have been healed and blessed by living the gospel of Jesus Christ and I want to share this because it has made me a happier, better person.

The question for the day is, “How Bright is your light?”  When I was around 18 years old, I received a sure testimony that Jesus Christ is our Savior and that He lives through the power of the Holy Ghost.  It filled my body with love and light, and it changed my life. I became more sensitive to what I watched, read, and listened to. I became aware of things from my past that I wanted to repent of, and then I did.  I wanted to be a better disciple of Christ and keep His commandments and live worthy of the Spirit. My life was bright and happy at this time.

For a few years in my life after I had my first two children, I felt overwhelmed, stuck, and depressed.  And then I felt guilty for feeling depressed since I knew logically that I was very blessed. I felt guilty for not being the wife and mother I believed my wonderful family deserved.  I hated myself, I hated my life, and I wondered what was wrong with me. The gospel was the plan of happiness, right? I wondered why, if I was reading scriptures, praying, going to church and the temple, why did I feel so unhappy?   This was a dark time for me.

So I’ve been on both sides of the spectrum, and now I’m somewhere in the middle.  I’m not at a dark point in my life, but I’m also not as bright as I know I can be, and I’d like to change that. And I invite YOU to take this journey with me.  So ask yourself, how bright is your light? Would you say you are happy, calm, and confident most days? Or are you frustrated, worried, overwhelmed, resentful, or depressed?

I want those of you who are overwhelmed and depressed and worried to know that there is HOPE.  There is nothing wrong with you. This is just part of the human experience we all signed up for, and being a human means there will always be “opposition in all things.” (2 Nephi 2:11)  No matter what’s going on in your life, no matter how hard it is, “you have not traveled beyond the reach of divine love. It is not possible for you to sink lower than the infinite light of Christ’s Atonement shines.” (Jeffrey R Holland)

In John 8:12, Jesus says “I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.”  This doesn’t mean we won’t experience darkness in our lives. But light is stronger than darkness; even a small night light can be seen in a dark room. His light will help us to overcome the darkness we experience.  

He also says in 2 Nephi 10:14, “I will be a light unto them forever, that hear my words.” If we want more of God's light in our lives, we can start by reading and studying his words found in the scriptures.

In D&C 93:28 it says “He that keepeth his commandments receiveth truth and light, until he is glorified in truth and knoweth all things.”  So we read his word and then we keep his commandments to receive truth and light. We try to implement what we read and figure out how what was written so long ago can apply to our lives now.  

In D&C 50:23-24, it says “that which doth not edify is not of God, and is darkness.  That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day.”  I think we’re all living below our privileges. God wants to give us revelation and inspiration for our lives, but if we’re overcome by the darkness, or becoming apathetic and lazy with our spirituality, we aren’t in a place to receive what He has to offer.    

There will always be a battle between light and darkness within you.  It reminds me of the story of the two wolves. One is fighting for good, light, faith, truth, love, hope, humility, kindness, forgiveness, compassion, etc.  And the other is fighting for evil, darkness, anger, regret, guilt, resentment, hate, etc. And in the story the question is asked, “which one will win?” And the answer is, “The one you feed.”  That’s the one that becomes stronger and that will dominate the other. Which wolf do you most regularly feed? How bright is your light?

I hope that no matter where we are, that we will determine to feed the light and the good within us, and to overcome the darkness in our lives.  I hope that together we can grow in the light, “brighter and brighter until the perfect day.”

Jeffrey R Holland

https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/04/the-laborers-in-the-vineyard?lang=eng

Photos by: Burak K, Kat Jayne, and rawpixel.com from Pexels.com, and LDS Media Library